While trolling the blogosphere for distraction from work I came across this crazed out site:

The Face of the Future: Transform yourself! Change the age, sex or ethinicity of a photo, or have fun with art and animal transforms.

WHAAAAAAA-????

I decided to try out the site and see what sort of Bizarro Helens I could conjure forth. Here were the results:

ORIGINAL ME

This is the photo of myself I submitted for transformation.

GUY ME

Geezh, I thought I'd look more different as a dude. Instead I look the same. (note to self: not good for ego) Anyway, I think I sorta look like George Takei more...and actually, yes, my Dad. If the masculinizer went at least 10% more I'd look exactly like him as a teenager here. Right now, this looks more like me over 40, losing my eggs and contemplating Replacement Female Hormone Therapy. Yeeesh!

CHILDHOOD  ME
Sorta looked like me when I was ten. I need to photoshop a bowl cut on me first to really tell. But yea, it's pretty much me as a kid but with a better tan and make up job. Maybe I should've named this JonBenet Me?

OLD ME

Whoah!!!!!!!!!!!
Hellooooooo Mortality!

ASIAN-ER ME

UMMMM....so the Asian-ifier apparently makes you look more cross eyed, trout lippy and flattens your nose?  WTF?!?!?!?! (note: if you are Asian and you try to transform using the Asian Filter, they will take you to your original photo. Therefore to transform your photo through your own race filter, you have to reupload the picture and specify that you are a different race in the beginning. To get this result I went all Banana and told the computer I was white so I could see what would happen if I got even more Asian. Reeeeeal interesting.)

WHITE ME

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!

Ok..I'm creeped out. I don't even look human anymore in this version.

This could be rather Serial Killer Me...or Eyelid Surgery Gone Wrong Me...the big changes here are they whitened my skin, gave me a fuller face and wacked out my eyes. But I don't think the eyes made me look more white...it just made me look more creepy. Which goes to show...don't eff with the eyes lest you start looking all freakshow. This kinda reminds me of the Uncanny Valley. BORG ME?!

BLACK ME
Black Me has a wider nose and fuller lips...but they kept my eyes pretty much the same. These results look less creepy than White Me because my lids and eyeshape remain all natural. You can still sorta find me in this composite.  Truly eyes are the window to your soul and all that.

Unlike White Me, I don't look like a Madame Tussaude figure here- but I don't look exclusively Black...I think I look Blasian!


WEST ASIAN ME
The site lists this as the West Asian transformation, but I think this should actually be called the Ambiguous Race/ Mixed Everything Me.

Here's a little slideshow/animation as my bizarro selves morph into each other. It's interesting to see in the animation what features grow and stretch as the same face changes age, sex and ethnicity.  (recommendation: set play speed to 1 or 2 seconds)